Doing less, more mindfully

It feels like everyone's doing everything all the time. Just looking around, noticing people be everywhere, doing everything, all at once, and doing it all seemingly well, is an intimidating experience. If it wasn't overwhelming enough to see people "thrive" in real life, while you are "falling behind", with one quick click of a button, Instagram is all too happy to dish out additional servings of people's accomplishments and milestones, each more grander than the previous, but all equally carefully curated by the OPs to share a piece (all?) of their (amazing?) life online. 

All this noise has a way of making you feel like you're missing out. Every movie you have passed on, every concert you couldn't make it to, every trip you couldn't go on - all of it stings just a little bit more if others have shown up when you haven't, and now there's proof on Instagram for what an amazing time you've passed on.

Full disclosure: I have always had a bad reputation for cancelling on plans, rescheduling, and generally saying "No" to a lot of things. That said, over the years, I've warmed up to saying "Yes" more than I usually would have, and never regretted it. In the last year or so, I seem to have gone on overdrive mode with this, partly because I was given explicit feedback that I need to "get out of comfort zone", but mostly because I wanted to experience first-hand what saying "Yes" to most plans feels like.

It feels exhausting. I seem to have underestimated the energy it takes to make plans, communicate and negotiate, follow-up and follow-through. To do this process over and over again -  with multiple friend groups, individual friends, family circles, professional contacts - is draining to say the least. It feels worse if you are going out of your way to do these things and they don't give you the level of satisfaction/fulfillment you thought they would. 

So I made a choice, a really simple one at that: I will do less, more mindfully. I will pick and choose what and who I give my energy and efforts to, and I will do it with all my heart, mind and soul. I don't want to fill up my calendar every day with things to do just because doing many things is considered cool. I will only do the things I enjoy doing, try new things when I want to, and continue to prioritize living a more mindful, involved life over a frantic, haphazard, impulsive one. 

At the end of the day, I don't have to show my "report card" to anybody. Honestly, is there a report card at all? I don't think this was ever an exam. Everyone's writing what they want to, with what they know and have, and my paper is never going to look like yours. And that's okay.

Love and light,

Abhishek G

Instagram | e-mail: abhishekgowravajhala@gmail.com